What Triggers us to Change?


A Letter from Eric


You have been on an amazing journey. Love that you’ve put it into a book. The fact that it weaves through (or ‘ends’) in Italy is fantastic. My Mom is Italian, and my sister lives in Milan, married with children.

You had some Powerful events that led you to a strong sense of – “Make the most of your time and life.” But…for most people, Barbara, what do you think is the impetus to really roll up our sleeves and challenge ourselves in all ways, on all levels?

What is it that gets us to go for the most authentic, powerful, joyful, abundant expression of ourselves that we can?

Would love to hear your thoughts if you feel so inclined to answer…


Hi Eric,


Thanks for writing such a great thoughtful letter. 


I think we all start our lives with a certain expectation of how it is going to be and when that wears off, we evaluate things differently.  Life experiences can either stop us dead in our tracks or it can motivate us to move forward.  Near death experiences tend to “instantly” change a person.  Dr. Phil says there are “pivotal” moments in everyone’s life that push us into different directions.  Of course, you can just wake up one day and say “No more!”


For me, Tom’s death lit a fire under my chair.  I saw  in a flash,  how quickly a  life can be over and if I had dreams, I better get on with it.  I also felt that I had nothing to lose by taking the leap of faith.  My long term marriage was over, my fiance was dead and  my only child gone off to college out-of-state.  I no longer found joy in living in Orlando, maintaining a home or doing the activities that kept me entertained for all those years. 


I am grateful for having all of those things, but at that point, I wanted something new, fresh and exciting.  For me, it was time and freedom to do whatever I wanted and not be strapped to schedule and, I wanted adventure. I was too young to wait for retirement and not wealthy enough to live without a job.  So, I came up with an idea of how to live differently.


Once you decide to want a certain thing, close off all other distractions or time wasters and focus daily on your goal.  Take action every day to move toward it.  The more actions in one day the faster you get there. All actions are either going toward or away from you goal.  There is no neutral.  If today, I decided not to take action, I am actually moving away from my goal because the earth/world is constantly moving and by doing nothing, you are naturally moving away.


We are each born with a natural talent. A skill that we love doing and makes us feel alive and happy to start each day. We feel like contributing productive members of society.  To find out what it is, ask yourself this simple question. “If money were no object, how would I choose to spend my day?”   At first you may say I want today on the beach and basks in the sun all day on a tropical island, which would be fun for a few weeks, but then gets a little boring.  Think more along the lines of create, teach, build, sew, write, draw, help, paint, live, etc.  We all want to feel that we are needed, appreciated, and contributing.


I am a natural motivator  and teacher.  I wanted to travel and live in Tuscany.  Never did I dream that I would meet Giuseppe and be able to help him promote his family winery and get to travel while using my natural talents.


When you are “basking in your glory”, whatever that is, people, places and events are naturally attracted to you.  When you give your best with passion, others automatically want to be a part of what you are doing.  Do what you love and radiate joy, then everything else falls into place.  Energy attracts energy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

1 × = seven